Dear The OCD Perspective Followers,
I have had the hardest time thinking of what to post about this Thanksgiving. To be honest, I’m just feeling very blessed for everything I have this year. I have never felt so secure and happy in my life. A big part of this happiness comes from hard work and determination to turn my life around. This being said I could not have done this journey without you.
I want to thank you all this Thanksgiving, for allowing me an opportunity to share my story with you. I have learned so much from you and your stories, whether it be from personally knowing you or connecting with you via social media. I am so thankful for all the people I follow on Twitter and those who follow me. It has been so amazing to connect with so many different mental health advocates and people on their own journey of recovery.
I want you all to know that it gets better. I know it may not seem like it, after 6 years of struggling, I never thought it would work. It felt like no matter how persistent I was, how dedicated and humble I was, it just wasn’t clicking. Then one day I met a therapist who truly understood OCD and from that moment on I changed. The interesting thing is that for me the change came when I was allowed to go at my pace. People sometimes think that the best way to overcome a fear is to just do it. They think if they push you into the deep end of the pool, you’ll get strength to just swim, and while this works for some people, it doesn’t work for them all. I found that allowing me to dip my toe in the water and gradually go deeper and deeper, it gave me the confidence to do more and the motivation to go deeper.
I may not drive myself places, I may not have a current job, I may not be able to be in a crowd more then 10 minutes without panicking. But you know what I can do? I can now attend my church service for both hours (by sitting in the hallway and then sitting in the back of the class), I’m going into my last semester of college before I get an associates degree, I can now not only have knifes in the kitchen, but I can wash the knifes and use the knifes. There are so many things that I can do this year, that I couldn’t before. Who knows maybe by next Thanksgiving I will have a job, maybe I’ll be driving by myself. The important thing is that you don’t give up.
I hope you all have an amazing Thanksgiving, regardless of the anxieties and stress that may come. I hope you can take a few minutes to not only think about what you are thankful for, but also all the accomplishments you have done. Even as little as getting out of bed on Thanksgiving. I know that life is hard, I know that sometimes it seems like things will never get better. But I promise you that there are things to be thankful for and that eventually it will get better.
Thank you all so much for your support. I appreciate each one of you. Keep on going and as always remember, You Got This!
Niki Porter; The OCD Perspective